3 months have gone by pretty quickly. And I've made a few quick decisions.
I'm going to leave Japan on December 15th. I'm going to board a jet in Osaka, fly to San Francisco, and then make my way to Boston. It's a 1 way ticket. It's the first one way ticket I've bought in my entire life. I feel like that's significant, even it it's a 1 way ticket back to Swampscott.
Swampscott is going to be a 5 month layover. Well, not exactly. I plan on taking calculus, statistics, and an accounting class at the local college. I'll also spend a few months applying to schools and hoping that they accept me. I may volunteer somewhere. I really have no idea. I'll keep busy, but it won't be long before the suburbs starts to break me down.
I'm going to apply to 5-6 different finance programs. 3 of them are in the Boston area, one of them is in Denver, one of them is in SF, and another is in Portland, OR. I may also apply to KU (they accept people up until June, all the other schools have admission cuts in March and April). We'll see how that goes. I would be happy at any one of them. Each city is filled with old friends and new experiences.
I'm worried about standardized tests. I'm worried about essays. It's going to be hard to convince the admissions people that an English teacher could // should do their program. Hopefully I'll get some good marks early on in the classes... I might be able to submit that information to the schools. I'm confident that my letters of recommendation will be good... but the GMAT... that's the monster lurking around the corner.
I guess my main argument is going to be that given my past, there was no indicator that I'd be successful in Japan. I'd never been abroad, I knew nothing about Japan, and I couldn't speak a word of the language in a useful, communicative fashion. Three years later, I'm leaving the country because I didn't want to take the plunge and become an immigrant. My classmates are off to college or trade school in Japan (something I could have done, but didn't want to). And even though I can't pass those stupid JLPT tests, I'm reading books and watching movies, understanding things, and nothing using an English dictionary.
If I don't get accepted, I'm not really sure what I'll do. I may just start the CFA correspondence course. If I pass level one, I may be able to start looking for jobs in December. And it would certainly help me with admissions the second time around.
If I get rejected, I'll call everyone that rejected me, ask why, and hope they give me some constructive criticism. Nobody will say “you don't have what it takes.” They'll all say things like “this is what you lack. If you go out and get it, you'll have a better chance the second time around.”
Enough of that.
The reason I'm leaving Japan? I'm not willing to commit my life to it. I'm no longer happy with being an English teacher (though teaching was a blast). I mean, for a while I was thinking about it. I was thinking about going to school in Japan (in Japanese) for a year and then doing a proper job search... but I just don't see a good model of success. The most successful foreign people in Japan, as far as I can tell, are people that leverage their foreignness for fame. “Hey, look at me, I'm the wacky foreign guy!”
I don't mind being an entertainer, but I don't want to be a clown. They're the saddest part of the circus.
The happiest guys seem to be the ones working in the bar or working in the restaurants. I could do that, but I don't think I'd be happy there, and I don't think I'd leave with much more than I started. I left Portland and moved to Japan to avoid that lifestyle. Doing it in a foreign country is no better than doing it in the city of roses.
I'm going to keep studying Japanese. I still want to get better, and I still want to have a relationship with the country and it's people, but I'll never be able to live in Japan unless I can find another job.
Then again, maybe everything changes when I'm back in America. People change all the time.
Because I have a ton of time, I'm going to experiment with a new style of learning languages. Basically, the idea is that if you don't listen and experience a language before you start to study it, you'll never get to a high level. The number a few schools have thrown around is 2,000 hours.
For the first 800 hours, you just listen, watch and guess. If it's at a school, you interact with the teachers. If it's at home, you watch something accessible to children. Sesame street, for example, is a great resource. It's visual, it's simple, and it's intended for people with a weak command of the language. Anyway, for the first 800 hours you just listen, listen, listen. No notes. No books. No dictionaries. Just absorbing the language. The key is that you have to guess what things mean. You can't just stare blankly, you need to try and watch the show as if it were your native language. Subtitles are fine, but only if they're in the native language. Basically, you're a baby. And you need to act like a baby.
Once you've done this, you can start worrying about production. Reading and speaking first, with writing happening around 1400 hours of study. At no point do you use a dictionary, unless it' a target language dictionary (French to French, English to English, Thai to Thai, etc).
I'm going to give it a shot. I'm planning on watching movies, TV shows, etc., for around 800 hours. Since I'm unemployed, this shouldn't be too hard. Right now, the only difficult part is trying to decide which language to do it in. Probably Spanish because I'll have the greatest access to free resources at the library (though Chinese is very, very tempting). The only thing I'll need to buy is a stop watch.
Oh, today I ran for the first time in years. The frisbee team is having a reunion late January, and I'm not going to be the slow, fat one. I'd never hear the end of it from Shane. It may have only been a 15 minute jog, but if history is any indicator, i'll be running around 45-60 a day by the end of January. Little by little.
So I guess I've got plans and things. Just nothing set in stone. No path laid out before me.
And that's not so bad. There are worse places to be.
Next weekend I'm going to see Boyz Noise at a small club in Osaka. Then I'll spend the next 2-3 weeks studying for the JLPT. Following that, I'll spend 3-4 days in Tokyo, return to Osaka, have one last weekend with my friends, and then hit the road. All that time is going to fly by, and then I'll fly away.
Monday, 9 November 2009
Thursday, 13 August 2009
久しぶり
it's been a really, really long time since i've written anything in here. sorry about that.
things are good in the eastern hemisphere. the summer is hot, the job is going well, and i'm happy with my japanese studies (despite being far, far less formal than a few months ago).
i'll try and hit on some major points.
1. japanese summer.
when i think of the summer in japan, i think of the following:
(a) beer gardens. summer is the only time of the year when i say to myself "damn, japanese beer is good." you know the effect a hot summer day has on PBR? it's just like that.
(b) cicada. loud, annoying, and when you hear them it's basically the national "bring 3 shirts to work" alarm. you'll need one for the commute, one for the first half of the day, and one for the final push. returning home in a sweat soaked shirt is fine. it's like nature has pat you on the back for a job well done.
(c) fireworks. they are everywhere, all the time. there are mammoth firework shows every weekend. you can even buy them in the convenience stores. most of the time these are just sparklers, roman candles, and other not-so-dangerous products... but most of them still blow up.
2. job. i still have the same job. i still teach kids. i'm getting better and better at teaching adults, and i'm enjoying my students. in fact, one of the students' parents thought i was so effective, she made him quit class to focus on other weak points. she basically said "his speaking is great. he'll be able to pass speaking sections for the next 2 years... so now we need him to study math and science." though i've lost a student and around $100 of monthly income, it was the first compliment i've received since coming to osaka. and it felt pretty good.
teaching english really isn't the worst thing in the world, especially when other areas of your life are going well... which brings me to....
3. japanese.
thought aspects of the language are still a mystery to me, i've come to learn the following things:
(a) most people, no matter how good they are, can't watch a t.v. show and translate it. this works both ways (japanese people trying to translate english, and vice-versa). translators mostly use scripts. so if i find myself enjoying a program but unable to "translate it," i feel pretty comfortable. i'd say that i can understand 40-70% of what i hear on the t.v. if it's a program with a topic i'm familiar with, that number goes up. then again, i think people would be surprised how much we learn from visual aids.
(b) kanji really isn't such a big deal. it takes a long, long time to feel familiar with them, but as long as i'm reading the "right stuff," it's not so bad. allow me to explain.
reading a foreign language is all about finding L+1 material. the L stands for level, and the +1 stands for something a little past it. enough that it keeps you thinking and paying attention, but not so difficult that you give up after a few sentences. for beginning, the best L+1 manuscript is probably a textbook followed by children's stories.
right now i'm reading a book called "Shining Service: The Story of Starbucks and my Success." (人が輝くサービズ：スターバックスと僕の成長物語）。it's fun. it's about a japanese guy that was living in america until he was 28, came back to japan and started working part-time at the first starbucks ever opened in japan. over the course of 20-30 years (not sure yet... only just started the book), he went from part-time to managing the starbucks operation in japan.
anyway, the book is pretty easy to read. i think i read around 15-20 pages an hour. each page has around 5-10 words i don't know, but i can usually guess what's going on from context. sometimes i simply don't know how to read a work, but i know it's meaning.
what's important is that i've finally found an ideal L+1 book. when i finish this, i'm hoping i can move onto another book that's slightly hard, and one that uses similar vocabulary. perhaps something about customer service in the fashion world? i've also seen a few books about nintendo and disney that seem to be written in similar styles with similar themes. if things go according to plan, i'll be done with the book by the end of next week and ready for the next step.
i've spent the last 2.5 years trying to get to this stage. and now i'm here... and though i can't pick up "just any old book" and start reading it, i'll be there with time. and i'm happy knowing that.
(c) learning japanese hasn't just been about learning japanese, it's also been a big lesson in learning, in and of itself. and i think i'm getting better at it. i imagine that the next time around (a new language... hopefully sometime in 2010) will be much easier, no matter what language i choose. i've been thinking bout some of the more common routes lately (spanish and the other romance languages), but i've also been considering korean and thai.
the biggest lesson? continue to search for L+1. don't sit around reviewing L. and don't push for L+2. let things take their course.
4. life in japan.
one of the biggest reasons i moved to osaka was so that i could have a city life. during my 9 months of japanese school, i really didn't ever feel like i was in osaka. though i had nice weekends and what not, i was often too exhausted to do anything. now that i'm out of school, i've made more friends, found more interesting places, and have started getting closer to people. i'll write more on this when i get back to america next month... i think being removed from japan will help me write about it.
5. i'll be in san francisco from 9/5-9/12. if you're in area, we should hang out. if your not, send me your phone number and i'll give you a call. easy as that: tg.weaver@gmail.com
6. i'm still completely unsure about what's coming next. graduate school? a new language? a new country? no idea.
7. right now i'm fasting. i've never fasted before, i really don't know why i'm fasting, and i'm not sure what to expect. it's only going to be for 2 days and i'm already half way through the first. i guess the decision to fast happened for the following reasons:
(a) i've wanted to do it for a while. it's always interested me. so what the heck, right?
(b) i don't have work for the next 4 days and i have no desire to travel. so if i have less energy than usual, no problem.
(c) i don't have any money. well, i do, but i've rather use the rest of my cash over the weekend, so spending two days at home reading and not buying anything is a good way to make this happen.
that's it for now. i'll try and write more when i get the chance. and i should have more of them in the coming months.
hope everyone's doing well!
things are good in the eastern hemisphere. the summer is hot, the job is going well, and i'm happy with my japanese studies (despite being far, far less formal than a few months ago).
i'll try and hit on some major points.
1. japanese summer.
when i think of the summer in japan, i think of the following:
(a) beer gardens. summer is the only time of the year when i say to myself "damn, japanese beer is good." you know the effect a hot summer day has on PBR? it's just like that.
(b) cicada. loud, annoying, and when you hear them it's basically the national "bring 3 shirts to work" alarm. you'll need one for the commute, one for the first half of the day, and one for the final push. returning home in a sweat soaked shirt is fine. it's like nature has pat you on the back for a job well done.
(c) fireworks. they are everywhere, all the time. there are mammoth firework shows every weekend. you can even buy them in the convenience stores. most of the time these are just sparklers, roman candles, and other not-so-dangerous products... but most of them still blow up.
2. job. i still have the same job. i still teach kids. i'm getting better and better at teaching adults, and i'm enjoying my students. in fact, one of the students' parents thought i was so effective, she made him quit class to focus on other weak points. she basically said "his speaking is great. he'll be able to pass speaking sections for the next 2 years... so now we need him to study math and science." though i've lost a student and around $100 of monthly income, it was the first compliment i've received since coming to osaka. and it felt pretty good.
teaching english really isn't the worst thing in the world, especially when other areas of your life are going well... which brings me to....
3. japanese.
thought aspects of the language are still a mystery to me, i've come to learn the following things:
(a) most people, no matter how good they are, can't watch a t.v. show and translate it. this works both ways (japanese people trying to translate english, and vice-versa). translators mostly use scripts. so if i find myself enjoying a program but unable to "translate it," i feel pretty comfortable. i'd say that i can understand 40-70% of what i hear on the t.v. if it's a program with a topic i'm familiar with, that number goes up. then again, i think people would be surprised how much we learn from visual aids.
(b) kanji really isn't such a big deal. it takes a long, long time to feel familiar with them, but as long as i'm reading the "right stuff," it's not so bad. allow me to explain.
reading a foreign language is all about finding L+1 material. the L stands for level, and the +1 stands for something a little past it. enough that it keeps you thinking and paying attention, but not so difficult that you give up after a few sentences. for beginning, the best L+1 manuscript is probably a textbook followed by children's stories.
right now i'm reading a book called "Shining Service: The Story of Starbucks and my Success." (人が輝くサービズ：スターバックスと僕の成長物語）。it's fun. it's about a japanese guy that was living in america until he was 28, came back to japan and started working part-time at the first starbucks ever opened in japan. over the course of 20-30 years (not sure yet... only just started the book), he went from part-time to managing the starbucks operation in japan.
anyway, the book is pretty easy to read. i think i read around 15-20 pages an hour. each page has around 5-10 words i don't know, but i can usually guess what's going on from context. sometimes i simply don't know how to read a work, but i know it's meaning.
what's important is that i've finally found an ideal L+1 book. when i finish this, i'm hoping i can move onto another book that's slightly hard, and one that uses similar vocabulary. perhaps something about customer service in the fashion world? i've also seen a few books about nintendo and disney that seem to be written in similar styles with similar themes. if things go according to plan, i'll be done with the book by the end of next week and ready for the next step.
i've spent the last 2.5 years trying to get to this stage. and now i'm here... and though i can't pick up "just any old book" and start reading it, i'll be there with time. and i'm happy knowing that.
(c) learning japanese hasn't just been about learning japanese, it's also been a big lesson in learning, in and of itself. and i think i'm getting better at it. i imagine that the next time around (a new language... hopefully sometime in 2010) will be much easier, no matter what language i choose. i've been thinking bout some of the more common routes lately (spanish and the other romance languages), but i've also been considering korean and thai.
the biggest lesson? continue to search for L+1. don't sit around reviewing L. and don't push for L+2. let things take their course.
4. life in japan.
one of the biggest reasons i moved to osaka was so that i could have a city life. during my 9 months of japanese school, i really didn't ever feel like i was in osaka. though i had nice weekends and what not, i was often too exhausted to do anything. now that i'm out of school, i've made more friends, found more interesting places, and have started getting closer to people. i'll write more on this when i get back to america next month... i think being removed from japan will help me write about it.
5. i'll be in san francisco from 9/5-9/12. if you're in area, we should hang out. if your not, send me your phone number and i'll give you a call. easy as that: tg.weaver@gmail.com
6. i'm still completely unsure about what's coming next. graduate school? a new language? a new country? no idea.
7. right now i'm fasting. i've never fasted before, i really don't know why i'm fasting, and i'm not sure what to expect. it's only going to be for 2 days and i'm already half way through the first. i guess the decision to fast happened for the following reasons:
(a) i've wanted to do it for a while. it's always interested me. so what the heck, right?
(b) i don't have work for the next 4 days and i have no desire to travel. so if i have less energy than usual, no problem.
(c) i don't have any money. well, i do, but i've rather use the rest of my cash over the weekend, so spending two days at home reading and not buying anything is a good way to make this happen.
that's it for now. i'll try and write more when i get the chance. and i should have more of them in the coming months.
hope everyone's doing well!
Thursday, 30 April 2009
happy may
i can't believe it's may.
1 year ago, today, i was in portland OR celebrating RF. i pretended to be daft punk with my friend allie and the help of the go-gorila crew. the idea was conceived 1 year and 5 months earlier while walking through a buddhist temple. the idea became a plan over drinks in cambodia while playing checkers with a street kid. a day before RF began, matt king, josh brown, myself and a few others were having our own private party in the S.U. kids in a candy store. two nights later, everything came together. we only fooled one person. but i guess it only takes one. and since the rest were dancing like fools, i think it worked out.
7 months ago i was in denver CO with some of my closest friends in the world. i think we got even closer. i find it the least bit surprising that seeing the happiest day of two people's lives quickly becomes one of the happiest days of your own. on a personal note, i also had the best beer i've ever tasted in my entire life. vanilla stout made in a bourbon barrel. once at the wedding and once with jeff wermer, minutes after the shuttle bus had dropped me off at the brewery. the businessman i was traveling with were quite envious.
4 months ago i had my second new years in Japan. 1 month ago i started my 3rd semester of japanese language school. 10 minutes ago i finished smoking the same pipe i've had since my college years.
9 months ago i was sitting on a pier in beverly MA with my parents. we had lobster, muscles, and a few pints of PBR. i can't believe that it was the special of the day. $1.50 pints. lutz prices and a great view (not that the lutz didn't have a great view... it was just... well, different).
this is fun. i'm going to take it a bit further.
3 years ago (more or less) i graduated from college. it was the second time i shook hands with colin diver. the first was well over seven years ago when i interviewed him as a freshman. i scheduled an appointment, walked in and we chatted about the red sox. i thought it was really neat, but he thought it was a waste of his time. and it probably was.
on graduation day, i got to introduce my parents to les, a 70 or 80 or 90 year old man that inspired me to live. it wasn't just his stories, his language skills, and his travel experiences that got me wanted to leave america, it was also the egg salad sandwich he gave me one day in class. random acts of kindness. lesson learned.
a little over 7 years ago i graduated from high school. i thought i was old. i didn't know what i wanted to do, but i knew i wanted to live in portland oregon. two weeks prior to graduation i spent the afternoon in the parking lot smoking a pipe. i shared a cigar with bill britton. 4 years later we would met at the flether school of law and diplomacy for a summer session. i studied finance. he studied international relations. he was basically the same, and i'd changed a lot.
7 and a half years ago i was inducted into the national honors society. 7 and a half years ago and one day later, i didn't care. what i did care about, however, was that i'd worn nail polish and an ugly pair of pants. and it wasn't necessarily what i'd worn that made it memorable; instead, it was some of the teachers reactions. though some teachers thought i was mocking the establishment (which i certainly was), others thought it was kinda neat. and since i had most of the brothers on my side (brother tim paul, head of discipline at the time), i didn't have much to worry about. i wonder if they still remember.
i was also introduced into the french national honors society. i didn't speak french.
around 11 years ago i attended my first day of high school. i remember being scared of the football players in their black leather jackets and menacing beards. 4 years later, i laughed at the football players and their douchy chin straps.
over the past 11 years, at some point i've wanted to be the following:
1. a professional snowboarder.
2. a teacher.
3. a professor.
4. a professional video game something-or-other.
5. a sniper (this was before i realized i'd actually have to kill people... i just thought the training was rad).
6. a bartender.
7. a DJ.
8. a poet.
9. homeless (professionally).
10. a full-time gambler.
11. a stock trader.
12. a lawyer.
13. a trail guide.
14. an agent.
15. a member or an organized crime family (granted they were gentle and not savage).
16. a philosopher.
17. a musician (specifically hardcore // metal).
4 years ago, prior to graduating from reed college (and thanks to three years of wonderful successes and failures with friends), i realized that i didn't want to be any of those things. i just wanted to be me, and me wanted to go to japan. for whatever reason. it also had to do with an army ad that said something like "if your life was a book, would you want to read it? go army." i didn't join the army, but i got thinking about the first chapter and how i wanted it set up.
1 year and 4 months ago i was in cambodia with allie and a cambodian kids that tried to sell us some soda. we listened to stop making sense and stared into a 2 thousand year old lake (ok... i don't know how old it was, but i'm willing to be it was at least three times as old as america). 2 hours prior to this, allie was searching for a toilet and i was sitting on a rock. a 55 year old man walked up to me while i was listening to life after wartime on the speakers. he started dancing and said something along the lines of "yeah man, i'm really feeling it." i'll never forget that moment.
so why all this? why now? i guess it's because for the first time in a long time, i feel like i'm on a new path. for the first time in 6 years i won't be in portland for renn fayre. logistically, this is a good thing. flights are expensive and my current job doesn't have the grand ol' JET salary. symbolically speaking, i've made a break. there's a six year tradition that carried out for nearly 25% of my life (and considering i can only remember 75% of my life, it feels like considerably more).
new traditions. new experiences. i suppose i'm on that second chapter. or halfway through the first?
i have some goals and ideas for the next few months. most of them involve passing standardized tests and gaining some recognized credentials. i plan on moving back to america before my 26th birthday. aside from that, things are very, very up in the air. without the annual RF, the year just got a whole lot less cyclical. and maybe 2 hours ago that was scary. right about now, i'm ok with it.
happy may!
1 year ago, today, i was in portland OR celebrating RF. i pretended to be daft punk with my friend allie and the help of the go-gorila crew. the idea was conceived 1 year and 5 months earlier while walking through a buddhist temple. the idea became a plan over drinks in cambodia while playing checkers with a street kid. a day before RF began, matt king, josh brown, myself and a few others were having our own private party in the S.U. kids in a candy store. two nights later, everything came together. we only fooled one person. but i guess it only takes one. and since the rest were dancing like fools, i think it worked out.
7 months ago i was in denver CO with some of my closest friends in the world. i think we got even closer. i find it the least bit surprising that seeing the happiest day of two people's lives quickly becomes one of the happiest days of your own. on a personal note, i also had the best beer i've ever tasted in my entire life. vanilla stout made in a bourbon barrel. once at the wedding and once with jeff wermer, minutes after the shuttle bus had dropped me off at the brewery. the businessman i was traveling with were quite envious.
4 months ago i had my second new years in Japan. 1 month ago i started my 3rd semester of japanese language school. 10 minutes ago i finished smoking the same pipe i've had since my college years.
9 months ago i was sitting on a pier in beverly MA with my parents. we had lobster, muscles, and a few pints of PBR. i can't believe that it was the special of the day. $1.50 pints. lutz prices and a great view (not that the lutz didn't have a great view... it was just... well, different).
this is fun. i'm going to take it a bit further.
3 years ago (more or less) i graduated from college. it was the second time i shook hands with colin diver. the first was well over seven years ago when i interviewed him as a freshman. i scheduled an appointment, walked in and we chatted about the red sox. i thought it was really neat, but he thought it was a waste of his time. and it probably was.
on graduation day, i got to introduce my parents to les, a 70 or 80 or 90 year old man that inspired me to live. it wasn't just his stories, his language skills, and his travel experiences that got me wanted to leave america, it was also the egg salad sandwich he gave me one day in class. random acts of kindness. lesson learned.
a little over 7 years ago i graduated from high school. i thought i was old. i didn't know what i wanted to do, but i knew i wanted to live in portland oregon. two weeks prior to graduation i spent the afternoon in the parking lot smoking a pipe. i shared a cigar with bill britton. 4 years later we would met at the flether school of law and diplomacy for a summer session. i studied finance. he studied international relations. he was basically the same, and i'd changed a lot.
7 and a half years ago i was inducted into the national honors society. 7 and a half years ago and one day later, i didn't care. what i did care about, however, was that i'd worn nail polish and an ugly pair of pants. and it wasn't necessarily what i'd worn that made it memorable; instead, it was some of the teachers reactions. though some teachers thought i was mocking the establishment (which i certainly was), others thought it was kinda neat. and since i had most of the brothers on my side (brother tim paul, head of discipline at the time), i didn't have much to worry about. i wonder if they still remember.
i was also introduced into the french national honors society. i didn't speak french.
around 11 years ago i attended my first day of high school. i remember being scared of the football players in their black leather jackets and menacing beards. 4 years later, i laughed at the football players and their douchy chin straps.
over the past 11 years, at some point i've wanted to be the following:
1. a professional snowboarder.
2. a teacher.
3. a professor.
4. a professional video game something-or-other.
5. a sniper (this was before i realized i'd actually have to kill people... i just thought the training was rad).
6. a bartender.
7. a DJ.
8. a poet.
9. homeless (professionally).
10. a full-time gambler.
11. a stock trader.
12. a lawyer.
13. a trail guide.
14. an agent.
15. a member or an organized crime family (granted they were gentle and not savage).
16. a philosopher.
17. a musician (specifically hardcore // metal).
4 years ago, prior to graduating from reed college (and thanks to three years of wonderful successes and failures with friends), i realized that i didn't want to be any of those things. i just wanted to be me, and me wanted to go to japan. for whatever reason. it also had to do with an army ad that said something like "if your life was a book, would you want to read it? go army." i didn't join the army, but i got thinking about the first chapter and how i wanted it set up.
1 year and 4 months ago i was in cambodia with allie and a cambodian kids that tried to sell us some soda. we listened to stop making sense and stared into a 2 thousand year old lake (ok... i don't know how old it was, but i'm willing to be it was at least three times as old as america). 2 hours prior to this, allie was searching for a toilet and i was sitting on a rock. a 55 year old man walked up to me while i was listening to life after wartime on the speakers. he started dancing and said something along the lines of "yeah man, i'm really feeling it." i'll never forget that moment.
so why all this? why now? i guess it's because for the first time in a long time, i feel like i'm on a new path. for the first time in 6 years i won't be in portland for renn fayre. logistically, this is a good thing. flights are expensive and my current job doesn't have the grand ol' JET salary. symbolically speaking, i've made a break. there's a six year tradition that carried out for nearly 25% of my life (and considering i can only remember 75% of my life, it feels like considerably more).
new traditions. new experiences. i suppose i'm on that second chapter. or halfway through the first?
i have some goals and ideas for the next few months. most of them involve passing standardized tests and gaining some recognized credentials. i plan on moving back to america before my 26th birthday. aside from that, things are very, very up in the air. without the annual RF, the year just got a whole lot less cyclical. and maybe 2 hours ago that was scary. right about now, i'm ok with it.
happy may!
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