i haven't posted since i turned 26. since that time, i've done the following:
(1) i've seen two separate friends get married.
(2) i've spent time in three different states.
(3) i flew somewhere because i was in love.
(4) i flew home. it wasn't mutual.
(5) i sexually harassed a stranger (to be fair, i thought she was my friend. turns out she was a stranger).
(6) grew a mustache. shaved the mustache. grew another mustache. i'll shave it tomorrow.
(7) purchased 4 sticks of deodorant. i forget them each and every time i travel. girls make me buy new ones (well, to be more specific, the fear of being stinky around girls who might care).
(8) mocked a friend who made homemade pickles. ate the pickles. felt foolish. they were great.
(9) gave a presentation on international trade theory. ask me about the diamond model sometime at the bar.
(10) finished a problem set with a girl from kabul (yes, that kabul).
(11) found a marching band festival while avoiding a fluff festival. we will march on the 9th of october.
(12) updated my resume. trashed my resume. updated it again. trashed it. why is such a simple document so difficult to write?
(13) joined some clubs. met some people.
(14) started to exercise again.
(15) quit exercising. too busy (it beings...).
(16) i now wake up at 6 am everyday.
(17) does being interesting require you to be lonely? i've thought about this for at least a month.
(18) babies? nah.
(19) it had been three years since i'd seen one of my best friends in the world. she still gives great hugs. maybe the best.
(20) i'd become excited all over again. things were new and different. a week later, nothing was new and everything familiar.
(21) i moved to boston. i have three roommates, and none of them have jobs.
(22) i quit my job. i wanted to fit in.
(23) i baked cupcakes for the first time in my life (first time i've ever baked anything, actually... one time i tried to make a cobbler. it didn't work out, so i'm not sure if that counts... ultimately, the cobbler had better results).
(24) i had a stop making sense dance party in a hotel room alongside a writer for a jewish newspaper.
(25) i woke up listening to the wu-tang clan, went for a swim, and had breakfast at a spinning restaurant... it took me a while to realize the restaurant was moving because i thought i was just still drunk.
(26) despite all that, i still can't figure out when to go to sleep. i still can't decide whether or not things are going well, going poorly, or not going at all. though it's completely NOT the case, i still can't help but feel like i'm coming up a little short. i feel like i've been rejected more often than accepted. i feel like i've had more breakups than dates. i feel like i've cooked 2 good meals for every bad 10. i used to exercise 3 days a week, but i'd focus on the 4 i didn't. i'm certainly not sad, but i'm certainly not psyched. it took me 20-30 minutes just to list 25 things.
so far, school is good. i like my classes, i like my professors, i like the facilities,... but i can't help but feel like something is missing. all of my classes are lecture based, and all of my tests are multiple choice. it's all input with minimal output.
sometimes i wish i could just take a year off. the grass is always greener.
is there even such thing as a year off? i mean,it's still a year, right? according to me, i took three years off while i was in japan. i come back here and people can't see that. suddenly it was my career. people can't see it as a means to an ends. after all, it's not what you accomplish; it's what you can put on your resume. totally lame. there's a box for "work experience," but there isn't a box for "accomplished life goals. made it happen while someone else was scared of sacrificing something and taking a chance."
honestly though, school is great. i wish i could write a more positive post. a few days ago i was super positive. i remember going to the airport with my father and blaa-blaa'ing about all the opportunities i had, my 2 year plan, my 5 year goals, etc.
the problem with a 2 year goal is that it takes 2 years. i need to realize this. i need to start breaking things down into simple, manageable goals. or stop having goals. or both?
i really need to go dancing.
Sunday, 26 September 2010
Saturday, 10 April 2010
bingo
I’m going to be (or currently am) 26 years old. Beginning in the fall, I’m going to pursue a graduate degree in finance. Three years down the road, I’ll be working for a bank, consulting firm, or something else in the field. Just like that, another 3 year brick of time.
Unless another school calls me back and offers me a big ol’ scholarship, I’ll be attending Brandeis in the fall. It’s a two year program, with a focus on finance and economics. Additionally, I’ll have the chance to study a language and live abroad.
What makes me most excited about Brandeis is that I’ll be able to do the following: gain careers skills, along with re-educating myself. In other words, I’ll get to take the classes I wish I took while I was at Reed, while gaining the career-related knowledge I currently lack.
I’ve always kicked myself in the butt for not studying abroad, and I’ve always been disappointed in myself for not seriously studying a language while at Reed (sorry Jerome. I’ll learn French someday… otherwise I’ll never be able to ride bicycles and smoke cigars in the proper manner). Additionally, when I graduated from Reed, more than anything else, I wanted to turn back the clock a year or two and get a degree in economics. Those were the classes that excited me the most on my way out the door, and in the near future, those are the classes I’ll be jumping back into.
I can see myself heading in a few different directions over the next 2 years.
(1) studying Spanish; spending a semester in Barcelona or Mexico City
(2) studying Chinese; spending a semester in Beijing
(3) studying Portuguese on my own; spending a semester in Sao Paolo
(4) mastering Japanese; spending a semester in Tokyo
I like all four of those options. I think I’m in love with all of them. I think that 2 and 3 are best for my career in the long-term, 1 is probably the most fun, and 4 is probably the best for my career in the short-term. It wouldn’t take a lot of effort to bring my Japanese to a professional level… but I want to expand my circle of confidence, I want to see new places, and I want to get new ideas. If I went back to Japan, I’m sure I would learn how to do more, but I’m not sure I would actually learn anything new or test myself in new ways.
Aside from career stuff, I’ve also found a really rad part-time job for the summer. It’s a cruise-restaurant in Boston. The money is good, the people are good, and it’s a very fun atmosphere. Additionally, I can take up to 3 guests on weekend brunch for free! So if anyone is visiting the Boston area, keep your weekend clear and let me know ahead of time. Mimosa, chocolate fountains, and a quick tour of Boston harbor are waiting for you.
I’ve had a plan for a while now: Before the age of 35, I want:
(1) to speak 3 foreign language fluently. The languages have never mattered, but that number has always floated around. I’ve always been amazed by polyglots, so I’ve always wanted to become one. Realistically, I believed that I could master a new language every 5 years on a part-time basis. I only spent 3 years on Japanese, but I spent all of that time in the country. I think that 5 years is still a good timeframe… maybe a European language would take less.
(2) to live and work abroad. I guess I’ve already done this, but I’d like to do it somewhere new, and in a new capacity. Being abroad is exciting and fun. If I’ve got a career-related job, all the better.
(3) to get an MBA, along with an MA in a specialized field. So far, it looks like I’ll be doing this in the opposite order. And that’s fine. Additionally, I could get an MBA in Europe, and that would certainly help me with my language goals, etc. There are so many amazing programs in Europe. Then again, maybe America will catch up to the European models by the time I’m interested.
(4) to travel the world. This is going to be the toughest one. I know that I can make 1 week trips here and there, but I want a long trip (at least 3 months, if not 12). The 12 month trip might have to come later in life, so I’ll just squeeze in a 3 month trip at some point. If I time it right, I can get accepted to an MBA program and take the trip before classes start. This would give me anywhere from 1-8 months, depending on how early I take a leave of absence from work.
(5) to leave my job at the age of 55 and travel the world for as long as I feel like. We’re talking years and years. I’ll do this by saving a ton of money and investing that money in lots of companies that pay dividends. The goal will be to live off of those dividends for as long as I feel like. Eventually I’ll return home… but I really like the idea of wandering the world for over 2 years... like that dude from Kung-Fu.
I guess that’s it. I don’t have a lot of goals… I suppose I’ve got benchmarks. And I’m ok with that. After all, I’m headed in a direction, and I’ve had the same benchmarks for a while. Most of the specifics will work themselves out organically (job, where I live, hobbies, etc).
So after a depressing post in Feb, I’ve got a more positive post in April...
…and boom goes the dynamite.
Unless another school calls me back and offers me a big ol’ scholarship, I’ll be attending Brandeis in the fall. It’s a two year program, with a focus on finance and economics. Additionally, I’ll have the chance to study a language and live abroad.
What makes me most excited about Brandeis is that I’ll be able to do the following: gain careers skills, along with re-educating myself. In other words, I’ll get to take the classes I wish I took while I was at Reed, while gaining the career-related knowledge I currently lack.
I’ve always kicked myself in the butt for not studying abroad, and I’ve always been disappointed in myself for not seriously studying a language while at Reed (sorry Jerome. I’ll learn French someday… otherwise I’ll never be able to ride bicycles and smoke cigars in the proper manner). Additionally, when I graduated from Reed, more than anything else, I wanted to turn back the clock a year or two and get a degree in economics. Those were the classes that excited me the most on my way out the door, and in the near future, those are the classes I’ll be jumping back into.
I can see myself heading in a few different directions over the next 2 years.
(1) studying Spanish; spending a semester in Barcelona or Mexico City
(2) studying Chinese; spending a semester in Beijing
(3) studying Portuguese on my own; spending a semester in Sao Paolo
(4) mastering Japanese; spending a semester in Tokyo
I like all four of those options. I think I’m in love with all of them. I think that 2 and 3 are best for my career in the long-term, 1 is probably the most fun, and 4 is probably the best for my career in the short-term. It wouldn’t take a lot of effort to bring my Japanese to a professional level… but I want to expand my circle of confidence, I want to see new places, and I want to get new ideas. If I went back to Japan, I’m sure I would learn how to do more, but I’m not sure I would actually learn anything new or test myself in new ways.
Aside from career stuff, I’ve also found a really rad part-time job for the summer. It’s a cruise-restaurant in Boston. The money is good, the people are good, and it’s a very fun atmosphere. Additionally, I can take up to 3 guests on weekend brunch for free! So if anyone is visiting the Boston area, keep your weekend clear and let me know ahead of time. Mimosa, chocolate fountains, and a quick tour of Boston harbor are waiting for you.
I’ve had a plan for a while now: Before the age of 35, I want:
(1) to speak 3 foreign language fluently. The languages have never mattered, but that number has always floated around. I’ve always been amazed by polyglots, so I’ve always wanted to become one. Realistically, I believed that I could master a new language every 5 years on a part-time basis. I only spent 3 years on Japanese, but I spent all of that time in the country. I think that 5 years is still a good timeframe… maybe a European language would take less.
(2) to live and work abroad. I guess I’ve already done this, but I’d like to do it somewhere new, and in a new capacity. Being abroad is exciting and fun. If I’ve got a career-related job, all the better.
(3) to get an MBA, along with an MA in a specialized field. So far, it looks like I’ll be doing this in the opposite order. And that’s fine. Additionally, I could get an MBA in Europe, and that would certainly help me with my language goals, etc. There are so many amazing programs in Europe. Then again, maybe America will catch up to the European models by the time I’m interested.
(4) to travel the world. This is going to be the toughest one. I know that I can make 1 week trips here and there, but I want a long trip (at least 3 months, if not 12). The 12 month trip might have to come later in life, so I’ll just squeeze in a 3 month trip at some point. If I time it right, I can get accepted to an MBA program and take the trip before classes start. This would give me anywhere from 1-8 months, depending on how early I take a leave of absence from work.
(5) to leave my job at the age of 55 and travel the world for as long as I feel like. We’re talking years and years. I’ll do this by saving a ton of money and investing that money in lots of companies that pay dividends. The goal will be to live off of those dividends for as long as I feel like. Eventually I’ll return home… but I really like the idea of wandering the world for over 2 years... like that dude from Kung-Fu.
I guess that’s it. I don’t have a lot of goals… I suppose I’ve got benchmarks. And I’m ok with that. After all, I’m headed in a direction, and I’ve had the same benchmarks for a while. Most of the specifics will work themselves out organically (job, where I live, hobbies, etc).
So after a depressing post in Feb, I’ve got a more positive post in April...
…and boom goes the dynamite.
Friday, 19 February 2010
The internet has become my juicer.
I told myself I'd update this blog when I got some news regarding schools, and that day has come.
Yesterday I opened my rejection letter for the Japanese Summer Language School at Middlebury. I was disappointed and shocked. Shock was the first to come, but that passed. Now I'm just left with disappointment.
They asked me if I'd like to be put on their waiting list, and today I'll give them a call and let them know I'd like to be added. I'm also going to try and speak with an admissions person... not because I'm angry or upset; instead, I want to know whether or not there was something about my application that was off putting. I thought that I would be one of the better candidates for the program, and they thought otherwise, so I really need to understand their perspective. I'm hoping it will help me with my future business school applications, in addition to giving me some closure.
**WARNING: QUICK RANT AHEAD**
I just don't get it. I spent three years in the country, lived in two wildly different areas, went from zero Japanese to basic fluency on my own, spent 9 months at a language school and graduated at their second to highest level. I was thrilled about taking the language pledge for the summer, and I was excited to share my experiences and the things I've learned along the way with the beginners. In my mind, I was a fantastic candidate, and I honestly can't figure out why they wouldn't give me a chance to be at their school.
**RANT OVER**
So far, being in Boston has been good. I've seen some shows, been dancing a few times, started classes, began my GMAT studies, etc. I've been a busy person. I also had a wonderful weekend in Arizona playing frisbee with old friends.
I've been busy. But I've also been bored. Playing the application game is a long, stressful process. And after getting the news from Middlebury, I've grown even more concerned.
Bored isn't the right word. Maybe tired?
The GMAT, for example, gets more important by the day. I'm starting to feel like I'll need a 700 (out of 800) to be competitive. And although my practice scores have been climbing steadily since I started studying, I'm worried that I'll reach a plateau. Worse yet, I'm worried that the stress on test day will tank my scores.
In addition, I need to start thinking about backup plans. It's a very real possibility that I'll be rejected from business school.
Business school was plan A1.
Middlebury was A2.
Just Middlebury, no business school was plan B.
Plan C? Yikes. I honestly haven't seriously considered it. My guess is that I'd start applying for business school again... they'll start accepting applications in November for 2011 admissions... but that's not really a plan. It's just another year of what I'm currently doing. And I simply can't afford to waste a year.
Yuck. I was hoping to avoid these sorts of posts, but when life hands you lemons, you gotta smear them all over the internet. Only then can you worry about finding the sugar and making something palatable out of it.
The internet is my juicer.
We'll see how it all tastes in May.
Yesterday I opened my rejection letter for the Japanese Summer Language School at Middlebury. I was disappointed and shocked. Shock was the first to come, but that passed. Now I'm just left with disappointment.
They asked me if I'd like to be put on their waiting list, and today I'll give them a call and let them know I'd like to be added. I'm also going to try and speak with an admissions person... not because I'm angry or upset; instead, I want to know whether or not there was something about my application that was off putting. I thought that I would be one of the better candidates for the program, and they thought otherwise, so I really need to understand their perspective. I'm hoping it will help me with my future business school applications, in addition to giving me some closure.
**WARNING: QUICK RANT AHEAD**
I just don't get it. I spent three years in the country, lived in two wildly different areas, went from zero Japanese to basic fluency on my own, spent 9 months at a language school and graduated at their second to highest level. I was thrilled about taking the language pledge for the summer, and I was excited to share my experiences and the things I've learned along the way with the beginners. In my mind, I was a fantastic candidate, and I honestly can't figure out why they wouldn't give me a chance to be at their school.
**RANT OVER**
So far, being in Boston has been good. I've seen some shows, been dancing a few times, started classes, began my GMAT studies, etc. I've been a busy person. I also had a wonderful weekend in Arizona playing frisbee with old friends.
I've been busy. But I've also been bored. Playing the application game is a long, stressful process. And after getting the news from Middlebury, I've grown even more concerned.
Bored isn't the right word. Maybe tired?
The GMAT, for example, gets more important by the day. I'm starting to feel like I'll need a 700 (out of 800) to be competitive. And although my practice scores have been climbing steadily since I started studying, I'm worried that I'll reach a plateau. Worse yet, I'm worried that the stress on test day will tank my scores.
In addition, I need to start thinking about backup plans. It's a very real possibility that I'll be rejected from business school.
Business school was plan A1.
Middlebury was A2.
Just Middlebury, no business school was plan B.
Plan C? Yikes. I honestly haven't seriously considered it. My guess is that I'd start applying for business school again... they'll start accepting applications in November for 2011 admissions... but that's not really a plan. It's just another year of what I'm currently doing. And I simply can't afford to waste a year.
Yuck. I was hoping to avoid these sorts of posts, but when life hands you lemons, you gotta smear them all over the internet. Only then can you worry about finding the sugar and making something palatable out of it.
The internet is my juicer.
We'll see how it all tastes in May.
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